Illuminataholics Anonymous

For years now we have known about my mom’s little ‘problem’.  Trying different treatments to help her battle her addiction: Hiding her purse, walking her through displays, showing her the effects her condition is having upon her personal life, strong words, endless discussions about it.  We have even considered counseling, but to no avail.  My mother cannot walk past a lighting shop, lighting department or even someone’s front window without looking, buying or talking about lamps.

Each Christmas, new shades must be bought and tried, each lamp must be moved around different locations throughout the house in order to find the most suitable spot for it’s qualities.  Each spring, lampshades must be exchanged and moved around and placed onto different bases to see their overall effect upon the dynamics of the room.  It seems that every spare penny obtained seems to go on buying lamps and lamp shades.  She is, in a word obsessed.  Each time the room is moved around she makes an excuse to go and buy another lamp or two to fill in the gaps that the reorganisation of tables has left.

I have been warned that this condition is highly contagious and that, if enough time is spent around the afflicted, the addiction can ‘rub off’ as it were.

On a completely different note, we moved our living room round on Monday in order to fit the little one’s playpen in a suitable position that she can’t reach anything that she shouldn’t, we can walk around the room easily and we can see her from all angles.  This left a sizable lighting gap, and realising that I no longer found my current illumination solutions attractive, I instigated a trip to find the perfect lamp to fill the gap.  Once I had purchased my new floor lamp with matching shade, I noticed that the light shade in the living room didn’t match my selection, therefore I would need to change it.  And while I was at it, the bedroom shade had begun to bore me too, maybe it was time for a change there as well. 

A sensible solution to a rather dim problem.  Not an obsession, not an addiction, not a problem at all.  I can quit anytime I want to…..